Frozen Moments by Robin Janney

Last week I posted two pictures for my Wordless Wednesday post. One was of my mother and her pup, who just had her first birthday and isn't really a pup anymore. But I think dogs are like kids who never really grow up. They're perpetual toddlers, forever pups at heart. Like my dog in the second photo. I'm not really sure how old my Jaclyn is, but I think she'll turn 7 this summer. You wouldn't know it by the energy she routinely displays...I wish I had half her energy!

Bath day...

Late in the year of 2016, my Mom expressed the desire for a lap dog. So, I began looking for one for her. Mr. Janney and I found a little doggy for her. Muffin is a mixed breed, terrier and pug I believe.

Mother spoils the dog worse than her grandchildren. I'm pretty sure the entire reason Mom makes toast in the morning for breakfast is so Muffin can have her share.

Unlike my dog, Muffin likes being in a lap. My dog Jaclyn will occasionally ask to come up to my lap, especially recently, but she's a little too big for it to be comfortable for either of us - it doesn't stop us from cuddling though.

My Mom is scheduled to have a lumpectomy on Wednesday, and I'm not sure if she's devised a method to keep Muffin (and the cat, Fuscias) from using her as a bed. Perhaps my sister will be able to provide enough distraction for Muffin to leave Mom alone so she can recover. Sara is going to be staying at Mom's for before and after the surgery, which is a relief for me since FMLA has only approved me to miss 3 hours of a shift for Mom's appointments. I'm actually using a vacation day for the day of the surgery. I suppose I could have more paperwork done but at this point I am sick to death of the FMLA paperwork.

Jaclyn as a puppy...her tail still wags that fast!

I've always enjoyed taking 'nonsense' pictures. Especially of our animals. I'm not sure why. I did this even before the days of digital cameras. Of course, I have plenty of pictures of landscapes and flowers as well.

I enjoy documenting my life in pictures. It's so much easier to take pictures than it used to be. Although now it's a matter of 'how much memory do I have left?' instead of 'how much film do I have left?' Pictures help the facing memory.

Let's be honest, as the years pass and things change...peoples faces fade in our memory. If I close my eyes and try to picture my father, it's a dim memory...pictures keep that memory from fading away entirely. While I can respect people's desire to not be photographed, it frustrates me because the photo being taken isn't for them...it's for years from now when someone wants to remember.

Left to right: sister Sara, Mom, me
(pretty sure that's Mr Janney's head behind me lol)
Photo cred: Sara

There are so many moments in time that I don't want to forget. People. places. Pets. Because time goes by faster than we think. It doesn't seem it when we're young, we think we have all the time in the world and we don't realize that those silly pics we're taking are capturing a moment in time we'll never see again.

It seems that just yesterday that I was thirteen and my biggest worries were whether I was going to survive another day at school and whether my father would be home or whether he would be back in the hospital. And here I am today, almost 42 and worrying about rent - still uncertain about what the future holds.

I had it all planned out as a teenager. Runaway when I became 18, go to Hollywood and become rich and famous (and marry Mark Hamill (forgive me Mrs. Hamill, I was young and dumb)). That obviously has not happened! Which I'm okay with, because I kind of like my Mr. Janney.

I apologize if I'm coming off too melancholy or too dramatic. It's just that I'm feeling the weight of life at the moment. I've managed to catch the same episode of Criminal Minds a couple times over the past couple of weeks. They usually begin and end their episodes with a quote. This particular episode ended with a quote I felt was applicable to my current phase in life.

I don't think that letting go means forgetting though. So I take pictures to remember the life that brought me to the place I am today. Where I will tomorrow. Because it's all connected.

Random Thoughts About Mother Earth by Robin Janney

I think strange thoughts, at strange times all the time.

My husband caught me at it one Tuesday afternoon during our drive into work and picked on me for the rest of the drive.  You'd think he'd be used to it by now!

I was deep in thought, and he said something all of a sudden as we turned by Wendy's.  Whatever it was, caught my attention and I looked over at him and said, "What?"

Realizing I had zoned out, he tried brushing it off with, "Nothing."  I did not let it go, I repeated what I thought he said, and he confirmed my hearing.  Which didn't clear up my confusion any because it made no sense to me (I'm not ever sure now what it was!)

He made a sound of disbelief.  "It was just on the radio.  Didn't you hear it?"

No, no I did not.  And that's when I made the mistake of telling him what I was thinking about so deeply that I missed the nonsense on the radio.

"I was thinking about how it's probably a good thing there's no Mother Earth Goddess, because of how we rape our planet. We drill into her, and raze her forests. And then I thought, what if there is and we just can't hear her screams because we've lost the ability to hear her?"

Somehow our conversation turned into cars and whether our transportation was wrecking the earth or not.  I'm sure it certainly contributes, but given that both Mr. Janney and I prefer older vehicles the tone of the conversation soon changed to makes and models and character.  He recently mentioned something about a car show in NYC that he'd like to go to, something I would have no problem with.

But, back to Mother Earth.

Since I first started writing this post, which is some time now, I've watched two 'end of the world' type movies,  San Andreas, and 2012. If The Day After Tomorrow was available on Xfinity, I'd have watched that one too. I often wonder what would become of society if the world were to drastically change liked depicted in any of these movies, because I often think too much.

For some reason, during the middle of San Andreas, I decided to look up a question about earthquakes.  I don't remember now what the original question was, because as I started typing it into the search field, good old Google suggested 'how many earthquakes today' and I thought...yeah sure,  why not?  It took me to  this link. there were 90 some earthquakes that day, and in the few minutes it took me to post that number on Facebook there were 2 more.  Not big earthquakes, they record anything 1.5 or above.

But that's not really the point is it?

This is probably very normal.  There have probably been dozens of earthquakes daily for millennia.  We're only just more aware of them because of how humanity has spread out and the ease of instant communication.

But then again, that's not really the point either.

What if it hasn't been this way for millennia? I mean, records only go so far back. And, if there was no one around to record an earthquake in the first place, geological evidence aside, it went undetected and unnoticed.

Her future is ours.

What if it is Mother Earth trying to get our attention? I dare say, she'll continue to scream louder until she gets our attention if this is so. What is all our drilling and digging and deforesting doing to her? I'm far from a scientist, but it's a safe bet that we're damaging our planet.  Whether it has a 'spirit' or not is beside the point.  We only have one planet, and her future is our future.

Knowing human history, I do wonder if we'll change our ways in time to save her and remain living here.  Pretty much because I know I wouldn't be chosen to survive the Apocalypse.  They always save those seats for the rich and the young and the smartest. I might randomly survive, but you see characters like me killed off all the time in these end-time movies. (Someone had better take copies of my books along with them!)

I guess I'll end my soapboxing now by asking: have you ever felt an earthquake?  I have, although I live in rural Pennsylvania.  I was one of the few Pennsylvanians who felt the 2011 earthquake in Virginia. Neither places are the first to come to mind when you think of earthquake.  I still think about that day.  I was on the phone with my mother, who was in upstate NY and didn't feel  much of anything. But I most certainly did.  I felt as though my washer was spinning out, unbalanced...although the machine wasn't even running.  And I remember looking at my walls, and I even said to my mother on the phone, "Why are my walls moving?" I was confused, and tried to stand up ... and staggered. And then it was over. It was short enough that I didn't have time to be scared.  It was weird, because I had neighbors who didn't feel a thing, and neighbors who did - and if you know anything about trailer parks, you know how tightly we can be packed.

Until next time, hope you are having a good week and are ready for the weekend!